Pass me the Polish

Well what d’ya know, we’re in Poland. Woo woo. I know, I can’t believe it either, but yup, the day before yesterday we rocked up to the border full of nerves and trepidation that for some reason they might not let us through yet there really was no need. After a bit of a palava over my bike documents with the first Ukraine offical an English speaking woman as nice as pie came over and sorted it all out. No fuss, no bother. Thankyou lady.

From there to the Polish barrier where you have to wait an unGodly number of hours for them to faff around and push the funeral procession through. But again, with barely any problem other than the now familiar suspicion that I’m smuggling drugs in from Pakistan we were on our way. Riding free. Riding Easy. We were now in the EU.

I don’t know if I’ve told you this or not – I get confused you see – but on the way t the border Dorothy had a ‘moment’. Let’s call her first collapse. Crusing along she suddently lost all power. Just blahhhh… down to 20 kays, no response in the throttle. Dorothy’s dead I screamed. But I of all people should know better than that. Twenty minutes later she was back alive, still not great, but kicking.

Yesterday then I had her serviced. I tried a few places who were either closed or no good, until finally, in one city I saw it; the big red ‘H’. There it was, a dealership for motorbikes just like mine. And so for the next three hours they checked valve clearances and carbuerettors, fed me all kinds of reasons why she’d be losing power; dirty fuel, valve clearance too tight, too much oil on the air filter. All that they put right, even pressure tested her and spannered everything tight.

And you know what.

She rode exactly the same. The same reluctance to go beyond 55, the same lack of refinement and vibration excess. Everything exactly the same. Bugger, what could it be? And then I remembered something that I’ve not told you until now. I think it could be the route of all Dorothy’s problems. Okay, here it is; my confession…

In Kazakhstan I let her run low on oil. Later that day she started clunking. She’s not been the same since.

There, I said it. And Dorothy I am so so so very sorry. What an idiot… low on oil, having come this far. Dickhead.

5 thoughts on “Pass me the Polish

  1. I think Dot loves you a lot that she’s still willing to ride, even after what you did to her!

  2. dude….you let her run low on oil!! there’s you stuffing your face with McD’s and you starve her of OIL!!! bastard!!!

  3. What an epic adventure! Do you realise that nothing can or ever will be the same again for you in life, I mean everything is going to have to seem so damn ordinary?! OK so reckon you have let Dorothy down, but if she is anything like Wendy she will love you forever! Can’t you buy her some Wynn’s or similar to ease her pain? Just check with any Honda dealership if this is “allowed” first then add it strictly in accordance with the manufacturers instructions (normally 10% of volume) and I reckon she will still take you home. Maybe just jack up the SAE grading of the oil to say grade 40? I wish you all of the very best and get home safely! Tell Dorothy we wish her well!

  4. Sounds like compression numbers are getting low. She may be getting a bit tired of this whole thing!
    Keep on motorin’!

  5. Dot is one hell of an Aussie Chick. Can understand she is reluctant to go and live in Pommie Land!